Try Harder or Walk Away?

Walk Away or Try HarderToday is Sunday, October 20, 2013.

Just about everyone has come across at least one situation in life about which they have to decide to give it one more try or just cut their losses and walk away. You might have had to decide whether to leave a marriage or a relationship, or give it another shot.  Perhaps you wondered whether to try once more to get into med school, law school, or grad school, or alter your career plans.  Maybe you had to figure out whether to stay in your current location or move to an area that was unfamiliar, but where life had more to offer you.  You might have weighed the possibility of leaving a job at which you seemed to be spinning your wheels, with or without the prospect of another job in the offing.  You may have been trying to have children, and wondered if you should consider adoption or just give up the idea of having children altogether.

Maybe you did all the “due diligence” types of things that anyone can do before making a decision, such as making lists of benefits and drawbacks for each option.  You talked to people, did some research, got all the facts.  It’s still hard to make those kinds of decisions, and many of us are dogged by the feeling that we may have made a mistake.  We wonder whether things might have been different if we had stayed with it, or if we had grabbed the chance to make a break for it.

In addition to making lists, talking to supportive and knowledgeable people, and doing some research, there are some inner things we can do to help us make a decision.

Try a spiritual exercise.  Spiritual exercises are like meditation, except we have a specific thing we are looking for, a question we’d like to have answered, or a problem we need to solve.  You can design your exercise before you start.  For example, if you have a spiritual guide that you look up to, go to see this person on the inner. If there is someone who has passed on, but whom you used to look up to for advice, you can meet this person as Soul on the inner.  Perhaps there is a favorite teacher or advisor that you used to be close to, but have lost touch with.  You can also meet with them as Soul, if they are in agreement with it.

You can use your imagination to mock up any location you wish:  it can be a natural place, such as the bank of a river, a sandy beach by the ocean, a quiet place in the woods, etc., or it can be a cabin in the woods, a beautiful room, or a plain office space.  For the purpose of your exercise, imagine that you have a meeting scheduled with this person, and that there are no particular time limits for the meeting.

Tell the person you are meeting with what the situation is and listen for their response.  They may ask you some questions to get you to think more clearly about the situation.  Perhaps they will hand you a book, a piece of paper, a scroll, an audio or videotape, or even a photograph or a mirror.  If they give you something, look at it to see if there is a message.  They may take you to a theater, where you can watch a show, or turn on a hologram for you to watch.  The message may or may not be clear or complete during your exercise.  If it is not, rest assured that the answer will be given, completed, or made clear when the time is right.

Be on the lookout for special messages or signs.  Divine Spirit often sends messages to us when we are out and about in the form of road signs, license plate numbers, an overheard conversation between strangers, song lyrics, radio chatter, advertisements anywhere, or a surprisingly prescient comment from a friend or relative.  We may be introduced to a book (and yes, I know people who have said that a particular book just fell off the shelf when they needed it) or a magazine article.  You may be introduced to someone new who will provide a key that will help you answer your question or solve your dilemma.  You may get a particular nudge to do something or refrain from it.  You may have a stroke of insight or a sudden intuitive understanding of the situation that you didn’t have before. Your answer may come in a dream. Remember that your answer will probably come unexpectedly, and that it may not be what you were hoping to hear.  It may simply provide you with a clue to continue your search. Most importantly, it will come when you are ready to hear or accept it.

When you get into the habit of making decisions by considering information on the inner, as well as on the outer, you tend to have a more complete body of information from which to make your decision.  Once you have made it, the next step is surrender and detachment.

Surrender to the outcome.  Once your decision is made, do whatever is necessary on your part to make it happen, then let Divine Spirit do the rest.  The outcome of your decision may not be what you were hoping for, but whatever happens,  you will learn something from it, and it may just be much better than you could have dreamed.  Divine Spirit seems to work best for us when we allow It a little leeway in our lives, because It sees the situation from a higher perspective, and from a 360˚ view.

Detach from the outcome.  This is slightly different from surrendering.  When we surrender, we allow whatever happens to happen, and we look for the benefits, whether or not they are disguised as drawbacks.   Detachment involves control of our emotions.  It doesn’t mean that we have no emotions, just that we control them to the point where we can acknowledge them, but we don’t have to act on them.  The outcome of the situation might be frightening, or make us angry.  The challenge is to acknowledge our fear or anger, determine the root cause, and work from there.  In any event, we can pull back and refrain from a knee-jerk reaction to our fear or anger.

Trust the process.   Life is one big schoolhouse. Our lives are full of experiences that result in lessons learned or unlearned, and tests passed or failed. We can choose to heed the warnings or not, and to accept the help offered or not.  It’s up to us. But the process of life is basically for our unfoldment as Soul.  It’s up to us how we play the cards in our hand.  One thing is sure: we will continue to learn and grow, whether or not we realize it, believe it, or like it.  🙂


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